Romance On Screen And In Real Life

Watching the O.C. you see relationships constantly fading in and out of harmony. The particular couple right now is Ryan and Marissa. It seems like every episode there is something that gets between them. The most recent episode has Ryan's decision about his education get between Marissa and himself. I'll recap so you understand:

Ryan and Marissa were kicked out of their plush and exclusive highschool, by the Dean of Discipline (a.k.a. 'the bad guy'). Marissa chooses to go to another, local, less glamaorous, highschool. And Ryan goes the homeschooling route. With the Dean of Discipline bent on ruining Ryan's future, Ryan decides not even to try for the future, and cancels his homeschooling. Upset by this decision Marissa tells a new guy friend about Ryan's decision, and this friend talks to Ryan and offers to put in a word for him with his uncle's fishing business. Taking this oppurtunity, Ryan gets hired as one of the crew on this fishing boat, meaning, he'd be at sea for three weeks at a time. Marissa is very upset about this and doesn't allow Ryan to talk to her. Skipping drama, in the end Ryan decides to stay with Marissa, saying something along the lines of, that his future is with Marissa, whatever it is. Marissa is happy and everything is once again koscher in Orange County. Next week we see one of Marissa's new guy friends get closer to her, and this makes Ryan jealous.

So as you can see, the relationship gets a lot of stress. And it's the same with other couples in T.V. series, Smallville, One Tree Hill, Bones, etc... all have couples that are in a constant state of flux.

Now, I know that this is T.V. and they have to do this to keep the show interesting. It would get boring if T.V. couples were in relationship bliss continually, so the producers have to do this, trying to cause viewers to relate emotionally to the T.V. show.

But does this relationship flux happen in real life too? Do couples have disagreements where one or both are too stubborn to even talk and try to resolve their issues. Does one guy friend cause insane jealousy in a boyfriend if his girlfriend and this new friend spend a lot of time together?

I find it hard to believe that this is really the case. Could it be that these television relationships are overexaggerated? Being a frequenter on a few forums, I've seen people post their issues in their love life. Break-ups, betrayals, marriages, etc... I've read a lot, and I know some of it is out there. But the intricate details, like the way I described about the couple from the O.C., are never posted on a forum. Does it happen, in real life? I wonder.

Continuing along this vein, I'd like to mention an intracy of relationships that I've pondered.

I am lucky to be in a wonderful relationship, but I know that isn't always the case with others. The city I live in has been called one of the most undatable cities (cities, not small towns) in the nation, that there is virtually no dating scene. When couples hook up, especially couples in their early to late 20's, they tend to stay together. Other cities, hook-ups and break-ups are common place, nobody raises an eyebrow. Just look at Hollywood, couples exchange partners as freqeuntly as couples exchange partners in square dancing. So it is hard for me to conceive why people are constantly getting together with people and then breaking up again.

For me, I've come to, occasionally, associate this break-up/hook-up process with something else. When you get a new toy, a new gadget, or a new lipgloss, you use it frequently. More frequently than you normally do. When a kid gets a new video game, he is able to play it days even weeks on end, not getting tired of it. When you hear a new song you like on a CD you bought, you can listen to the song again and again, not ever getting enough of it. But all of sudden, one day, the kid stops playing the game because he simply doesn't have interest in playing it, or you stop listening to the song that you've listened to constantly for the past month, or the new gadget you have just becomes used by any other gadget you have.

Can this be related to relationships? Is it an accurate analogy for explaining why guys and girls are constantly hooking-up/breaking-up? When a guy meets a beautiful girl at a bar or café, and they hook-up, then three weeks later they cannot stand the sight of each other. Is this because they just got tired of each other, they became overhead songs or an overused gadget to each other? This can be called burnout, but even couples who have spent a month, two months, or more, together, just break-up, for no reason except that there is no interest anymore, no spark. Like a toy that has lost its appeal? Possibly. It seems like an analogy that is accurate to me. People would probably disagree with me, offering up any number of reasons why couples break up.

In any case, it's just one view.

Ciao for now.